My Discontented Heart

While doing a study today, I realised something about myself that I hadn't put to words before. In the book of Numbers chapter 11, it talks about the Israelites being taken through the desert. God had provided them with manna for food to sustain them. They had some foreigners travelling with them who began to whine and complain about the manna. They longed for other food like the meat they used to eat. The discontent of these foreigners spread to the Israelites. Instead of being thankful and satisfied for God's provision, they started to whine and complain that they wanted more. So the Lord gave them over to their sinful desires and sent them tons and tons of quail. They had their fill of meat but God also sent along a plague and many of the people died. They named the place of their death,
Kibroth Hattaavah (which means "Graves of Craving"). They had everything they "needed" from the Lord but they wanted something different. The discontented heart is never satisfied and craves for more.
I felt convicted by this lesson. I too, have become discontented with the Lord's provision at times. I think I know better than He does. Right? Wrong. I repent for the times lately that I have had these thoughts. Perhaps they haven't been so straight forward but when it comes down to the crunch, that is what I'm thinking.
He knows me better than anyone else does. Psalm 139 says that He knows my inner most being. He knows when to reveal truths to me so that I will "get it". He knows when to hold back because some truth will overwhelm me too soon. He has held back prayers that I have prayed for not only my own good but for the benefit to those around me. God has "life" down to a fine art. His timing is perfect and His ways are perfect.
Lord please help me to remember that when I feel like whining in the desert. Your manna is perfect for me.

Beyond the Manger

As I sit on this Christmas Eve somewhat exhausted from the shopping and preparations over the last few days, I find myself feeling a little overwhelmed with life. Perhaps it is just the fatigue coupled with the high family tensions but nonetheless, it's not appropriate on this holy night. I then reflect on that night over 2,000 years ago. A young couple, a pregnant teenager who had just travelled by donkey over a rugged terrain. Her birthing room was not going to be in a sterile hospital room like today, but in a stable with a feeding trough for her newborn's crib. This couple's baby was the King of kings and Lord of lords. I wonder if Mary felt overwhelmed by her surroundings? Did she complain to Joseph about their accomodations? After all she had just travelled long and hard, ready to give birth. She must have been so uncomfortable. Whether or not she felt frustrated, we are not told. Mary, however knew that she was given the privilege of carrying and giving birth to the Messiah. This was her path in life and she accepted this in obedience to her God. She was favored among women. A special place to be in.
I need to remember that I also have a path in life. It is not a path of raising the Messiah, but I am given the responsibility of raising my children in the ways of the Lord. That in itself is an honoured position to be in. I need to reflect God's teaching and love to my children and my unbelieving husband.
God has set out this path for me and I need to be obedient, just as Mary was. In a different way, I have found favour with God by Him giving me "this" family and "this" responsibility(though I don't feel the least bit deserving).
God selects His caregivers very carefully. He expects me to do as Mary did and look beyond the manger. To see beyond the circumstances today and see others and myself with His eyes and not with my finite ones.

Does God Giggle?????

We all hear alot about Random Acts of Kindness and as a Christian, I like to think that I am R.A.K. obedient from time to time. Of course, I am not looking for recognition or credit, but I do have to share about one particular act today that got me thinking. I was going through the drive-thru at Tim Horton's for coffee and as I was paying for mine, I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me to pay for the person's order behind me. I had enough money so I proceeded to pay for their's. I wanted to scoot out of there quickly so they didn't see me when they were told their order was paid. I found myself giggling as I rushed out of there. I had so much fun with it and it made me all giddy. It occured to me later, "Does God giggle when He blesses us at unexpected moments?". I have to think that He probably does. He takes great joy in blessing His children, but do we always acknowledge Him when we do receive? Do we always give Him the credit for these blessings or do we credit our own effort and will? James tells us that "Every good and perfect gift comes from above", so in essence every good thing that happens to us is as a result of Him and His will for us. Perhaps someone has paid for our coffee or given us a compliment when we are feeling down, but we owe it all to the Lord. It is He who has prompted that person to pass on that blessing or "good thing".
So the next time you receive a blessing, just picture the Lord giggling and it will be sure to make you thankful that He cares enough about all the little things in your life.

Hello Sunshine!!!

Awhile back I shared about a blog that I have been following of a teenage girl from Iraq. I guess her blog was featured on MSNBC last night. If you haven't already, check out this girl's blog. It helps to see things in Iraq through a teenager's eyes. So much about her is so similar to any teenage girl, but the things that are different truly set her apart.
http://livesstrong.blogspot.com/

My Mission Field is at Home

We have a retired couple in our church that regularly go to the mission field. Anywhere from India to the Ukraine they are always ready, willing and very able to accept God's call on their lives to missions. I remember specifically one day sharing with Betty, that I would love to go on a short term medical mission one day. Her words to me have repeated in my mind many times since then, "Your mission field is at home". I know those words were from the Lord and Betty would never take credit for the impact that those words have made on my life. She is a very humble woman that way.

My husband is not a believer in Christ, my teenage daughter has had her share of challenges in the last few years, both emotionally and spiritually. My son is just eight and is probably the most spiritually mature Christian in my midst and very eager to learn the truths of Scripture. That in itself is a full mission field. Sometimes I wonder why God has entrusted this job to me. I am so unworthy and so imperfect. I struggle with patience, anger (although He has worked wonders on me in both those areas through the last couple of years) and I don't fell equipped for such an assignment. I struggle to be the example as a Christian wife and mother almost daily.

Many times I don't feel appreciated and want to walk away. One thing keeps me going each day and that is the unconditional love and acceptance that my Savior has for me. This is so evident each and every day. He never gives up on me or ever wants to walk away. He sees and accepts who I am and also sees where He is taking me to. He sees that as being "worth it" in the long run. That is how I need to see my "mission field" as "worth it" to look at my family through the eyes of Christ and where they will be one day. The struggles and hurdles of today are the character builders of tomorrow's dedicated Christians.

EFT stands for "Enough Foolish Talk"

Yesterday I was visiting a patient. Both he and his wife are wonderfully polite and nice people. They are quite affluent with a large beautiful brand new home. I found out that he is a retired executive with an obvious higher education. While I was doing an uncomfortable dressing procedure, his wife grabbed hold of his hand and started "tapping" in some key areas. She began to repeat the phrase "Even though this hurts like "hell", I completely love and accept myself". Over and over she repeated this with the sequence of finger tapping. I honestly felt a "shudder" down my spine. I knew in my heart that this was some sort of New Age therapy that was not something I wanted any involvement in. Upon enquiry, the wife told me that this was called EFT, which stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. She shared that it works by "crossing the meridian". I just nodded my head and smiled. She had learned the technique from a friend.
My heart felt sad for this couple who have lived a life of travel and prosperity. Having always lived by their own rules and means, they were turning to a "religion" of sorts that also caters to their own rules and means.
I checked out a web site on EFT and it is a technique that is full of "tapping" in key points much like acupuncture as well as repetition of affirmations. The phrases were much like the one this woman had used but of course they were altered according to the situation that one needs emotional freedom from. They instruct that even if you don't entirely believe the phrases, to repeat them anyway. Much like a chant I would say, but of course filled with more and more emptiness.
People are so desperately searching in the 21st Century life. There is such a need to fill that void in their life with something spiritual. My heart aches for those who seem to "have it all" when in all actuality they have "nothing". I often compare much of the New Age culture with a bag of candy floss. It may taste good and seems like it should be "filling" but it is really just a bunch of sugar, packaged to seem like something grand.
The world so urgently needs Jesus Christ, but many continue to turn to the things that puff up the "self" which leads to spiritual and even physical death.

Carry One Another's Burdens

A few months ago my son and I went to the pet store and purchased a pair of zebra finches. I liked the squeaky little sounds that they make and felt that it wouldn't be a noise that I would get tired of. I decided to name them Ruthie and Boaz after the couple in the book of Ruth in the Old Testament. If you have never read it, please do yourself a favor and do it. It is a wonderful romantic story of Boaz, the kinsmen redeemer and Ruth, a devoted daughter in law who connect, marry and solidify the lineage to Jesus. Anyway, these two birds have been fun to watch. Ruthie did lay some eggs and she and Boaz shared the duty of sitting on the eggs until they hatched. To see Ruthie step out of the nest to eat, followed by Boaz jumping in to warm the eggs was heartwarming to say the least. Their babies didn't survive this time around but we will probably try again.
Yesterday I came home and looked in the cage and to my horror, Ruthie was hanging upside down in the cage with her foot caught on some kind of thread. I really thought she was dead. Who knows how long she had been like that. Thankfully she was alive and I held her as I untangeled this thin thread that was wrapped around her small foot. There seemed to be certain damage to it as she was unable to keep her balance. She sat on top of the nest and had to prop herself using her wing. I moved her food and water close to her, as I thought she would starve because she couldn't balance. To my surprise, when I got my human hands out of the cage, Boaz rushed to her side and propped himself up against her to hold her up. He didn't leave her side other than when this silly human would put her hands in there to rearrange things to help Ruthie.
If we all could learn a lesson from one of these smallest of God's creatures. Boaz was there to carry Ruthie's burdens. He wasn't concerned for his own needs and take all the food for himself, he was there for her in all situations. He "supported" her in the only way he could.
Today Ruthie seems to be back to her old self. The temporary injury seems to be less of a burden for her. Thanks to the rest she was able to have with Boaz being there for her in her time of need.