Over the last few weeks, we have been having several challenges to deal with in regards to my teenage daughter. Her goal has been to move out of the house when she turned 19, which was on the 6th. Her lifestyle and friends have been in conflict with ours for these several weeks. Ironically, this lifestyle change in her life has also coincided with the absence of any contact with her father. This is not the first time this has happened. When she was 16 there was an 18 month period that her father chose not to have any contact with her. While I don't "blame" her poor choices on him, there is ample evidence to suggest that a father's presence is cruicial in a child's life. The acceptance and nurturing helps to shape a young woman or a young man's personality.
That being said, the latest choice to move out has taken on several scenerios. First, she was moving in with another girlfriend and the fact that my daughter no long had a job didn't seem to be an obstacle. This fact has now changed and that door has been closed. The latest goal has been to move in with "several" people of questionable character in a lakeside town near here. Last night I decided in a moment of despiration, to call her father. I asked him if it were possible that she come and stay with him just for a few days. I could hear the hesitation in his voice. I shared the challenges that we have been dealing with. He has not seen his daughter since February and only lives an hour away. He spoke with her on the phone and essentially told her that this was not an option. She was quite upset when she got off of the phone. She no longer wants to call him "Dad" as she feels that his allegiance is to his new (and third) wife and her three children. In all honesty he has not really been a father to her since she was 5. The rejection in her voice was certainly evident. I'm not sure how a parent can reject a child like that but this has certainly not been the first time.
While in the pool last night, I was praying to the Lord and asking Him why all of these doors for her to move out are being closed? He spoke to me in a still small voice saying, "Because she isn't supposed to leave." I was shocked. I really felt that her leaving was going to be the answer to the turmoil in our family. It is what she wanted and we were wanting that too. My husband's statement is, "If she doens't move out, I will!".
So Lord, you have to do a miracle here. Not only will you need to soften my husband's heart to have compassion for my daughter, but you also have to change the heart of my daughter. She needs to change her lifestyle and get onto a track of right living.
I have to say, the task seems daunting. This has been an uphill battle from day one. But I have to say that something changed in me last night. I can't put it into words just now, but there is more peace. I slept better last night than I had in ages. I feel a love for my husband that I haven't felt in weeks. A new hope in my daughter's life has caused me not to feel so defeated and hopeless about her future.
I guess He has already performed one miracle and that is in me.
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